Ideas To Communicate With Kids
Most parents are busy. They have an agenda and tasks to complete. One important one is to keep their kids in the loop. More importantly, to have their kids keep them in the loop. Try these ideas for a better communication with kids.
8 Ideas to Communicate with Kids
Act When Asked
Respond to a kids request. This usually involves doing something with them and that is okay. Breaking down an activity and spending 5-10 minutes with a child is a great way to bond.
Just the act presence is enough to build strong relationships. When a parent acts when asked, children learn to trust them and rely on them more.
The point of children relying on parents is so they come to parents instead of peers when they have challenges.
Get on Their Level
Get on their level, not just in thinking but at their height. When a parent gets to their kids level, they can see their eyes and their expressions. They have a chance to focus on their parent.
When a parent comes down to where they are, they are more willing to look up to their parent when they stand up. You already had their attention, take it with you and keep them engaged.
Talk Straight
It is easy to try to explain something in a way that makes something seem like not a big deal or dumbed down when it could actually be a big deal. My son made the comment to my wife that he was going to take pictures of me while I was going to the restroom. She told him that was inappropriate and told him not to. This is good. The conversation was direct and he now knew that was inappropriate.
Don't be afraid to talk straight and direct to children. If they are learning to talk straight and direct from parents now, they will talk that way when they grow up.
Talk to Kids One to One
Children love attention, they love being with their parents. They also need examples of what to do and what not to do. When child behaves or acts inappropriately, correct them. This can be embarrassing in public or around their peers. Try do do this in a private setting.
One way we have found to have a private conversation even in a public place is to simply go for a walk away from the group. We call it a Talk Walk. Here is some more in depth information on Talk Walk's.
Another note is to teach kids the importance of privacy. Some conversation need to be private but also our bodies. Teach children that their bodies are private. To learn more on how to communicate body privacy visit here.
Reassure your kids that being honest and talking about their feelings is not bad.
Stick Up to Your Values
On this "Talk Walk" I took this one step further to encompass challenges he will face when he gets into school, he is still in preschool. With the understanding that we need to tell someone, a trusting parent, teacher or church leader in his case.
The goal is for children to say something when they see something. Have an opinion and knowing how to express it is an important skill.
I told my son that he can also say something to his friends [peers] if they show him naked pictures or videos.
A simple comment to them that what they are doing is inappropriate and not stuff that he wants to see, would be effective.
The hope is that he learns to have values and stands up for them.
Thus it is important for parents to also communicate their values and stick up to them in conversation with their children.
Tell a Story to Illustrate a Point
One of my favorite stories to tell my kids is The Little Boy that Cried, Wolf!
I am not actually sure if I have the ending right but essentially, the little boy has the night shift to watch the sheep and he wants to go to sleep so he yells, WOLF!!
All of the family comes running, after hours of them trying to find the wolf in vain they find the boy sleeping. This happens several nights in a row. Finally the parents say to the boy that they will not come if the boy yells wolf again.
In the version I tell, the little boy gets eaten because no one believes him when he cries wolf the last time.
Every time this story is told, there is a captive audience. My son asks if that really happened. I say, "Yes." I always explain the point of the story, however.
Do Not Tell a Lie
The point driven home is that children should not lie. Eventually no one will trust them and no one will want to be their friend and they will be left alone to defend themselves when the wolves come.
My kids understand the concept of the story. Lying is bad and trust is lost with others when a lie is told.
Teach Children to Talk to Adults
There is a large house built in the late 70’s at the entrance to our neighborhood, in the back yard is a garden plot. It is huge! My daughter wanted to tour the garden. Before we went over to the house to ask for a tour, I prepared my daughter to have a conversation. I told her to:
When the woman opened the door I simply said this is my daughter and she has a question for you. She repeated what we practiced and the woman talked directly to her instead of me. It was great for her to have that experience and they gave us some produce from their garden.
When children engage with adults they learn valuable skills. Once they turn 18, they are going to be talking to a lot of them. Might as well start young.