The Third Connection
How to Use your network to get the connection to the next step
How often do you find yourself at an event with a bunch of people that you don't know? You may be tempted to "find a quiet corner" and search for someone you do know. But by the time you find them, your friend is surrounded by people that they have known for years. The opportunity is gone, one might think. Don’t let a crowd stop you from mingling. Step into the circle and say something directly to your friend briefly so the conversation isn’t interrupted. Chances are your friend will do the introduction for you.
The third connection - also known as the warm introduction - can help bridge any gap in familiarity between two people who want to meet each other or that you want to meet but haven't been introduced before.
Here are our seven key steps that will help you make a connection with anyone!
Know when to say yes
One of the best ways to get ahead in life is to know when and how to say yes. Sometimes, we might think that it's better not to make any commitments because of the potential for more work being dumped on us. However, saying no can actually be a bad thing as well. For example, if you are offered an opportunity at work or someone wants your opinion on something in their personal life and you turn them down, they may feel slighted by your refusal and avoid working with you in the future.
The easiest and most reliable way to get ahead is to say yes when people ask you for favors.
The reason this works so well is because people love feeling important, which means they'll likely want to return the favor in some way or another. This will not only make them happy, but it's also an opportunity for you to put your best foot forward while expanding your network of contacts.
Share what you know and ask for help when you need it
In almost any situation when meeting new people, the focus should be on how you can help them. Too many times, we make connections and expect because we know someone who knows the person we are connecting with, we are automatic friends and can ask for anything. A relationship has to be developed first and then we can move forward into an exchange of services. Provide value to the relationship to get a reward.
Use connections as an opportunity to grow personally and professionally
There are so many avenues of where we can take relationships. Some turn into lasting friendships and others are strictly professional. Either way any connection can lead to help on either side of that spectrum. Keep in mind that some connections won’t work how you thought they would. Be open to the dynamics of a new relationship and what can be gained from both people. One word of caution, do not expect anything from others.
Be the person that people want to know
I worked closely with a guy that seemed like he had done it all. He travelled the world, went on a mission trip to Nigeria, was in a couple of movies, just did some really cool things. He always had a great story to tell and was fun to be around. He also knew people. He had so many connections and he could get people in touch with someone else to get what they wanted. I even found myself calling him when I needed some cheap SkullCandy type headphones, which he had an answer for.
People want the easy answer, they want to just call someone and have an answer. The more you know, and the better you can communicate that to others in a way that people want to listen to, the more valuable you can be to others. Be cautious that most people will want advice and direction for free and being a walking Google can get old.
Where to go From here
We have discussed strategies to expand your network and get a connection by talking with others inside your circle of people. Remember that a connection is a gateway to many other opportunities. Bring value to every relationship and give more than you take.